what life is about...

Its those little moments that make life great... Weird starting sentence I know but its true. In life it's not the money or how popular you are that make life great. It is those funny fun moments in life that bring a smile to your face. It's the moments where you laugh so hard you have tears running down your face. Where milk comes out your nose because your friend told a funny joke. The first kiss or first time your heart skips a beat. Those days where you are care free and you feel so happy you want to dance in the rain. The nights where your bedroom because a dance party. When the night is yours and you feel as if nothing could ruin your day. Those moments are what make life the greatest thing...the reason we smile, laugh, and cry. To be honest when you grow up and you're staring out you window, are you going to remember what grade you got in physics? How many votes you had for class president? Or the moments that made you feel so happy inside? that made you felt like you belonged. The moments where you know... that your happy just the way things are.

Summers day...

I miss the feel of the warmth of the sun on my skin
The feeling of peace inside my heart
The sounds of the birds singing
I miss the happiness I felt every morning
The feeling of safety
The feeling of a summers day

Some guys...

So I guess that I might have assumed the worst out of guys in one of my earlier post labeled GUYS. Yeah, there are a lot of guys out there that are self centered or just don't care enough to try when it comes to people they like. And it's true a lot of guys act a certain way, but I will admit some guys don't.

Some guys try harder then anyone else when it comes to relationships.

Some guys even though they might be scared to show their feelings will spontaneously do the most amazing things for the girl they care about.

Some guys are sweeter and more kind then any other human being on the planet.

Some guys are super romantic.

Some guys care.

Some guys put every person before themselves and would give you the coat of their back just to keep you warm.

Those some guys are the reason girls look for "the one" and judge harshly when it come's to guys. Because of those some guys we know how amazing how men can be, how amazing they can make us feel. And give us a reason to believe in love.

Because of those guys...well they are the best type of guys you could ever wish for.

You never cared

"I wish he meant it when he kissed me cause then I could look back and see someone who loved me but I can only go back and see someone who used me."
~Unknown



So here is the thing I don't get about teenagers, How can we be so insensitive sometimes? Why do girls use guys to get another one jealous and vise verse with guys? How can they not see that while using someone else like a puppet they don't notice just how much their act effects them. So I don't mean to get very weird and confusing here but say you use someone as a puppet to try to get another girl or guy jealous. A human puppet will fall for the act...but they can always tell when they are on strings. If you don't followed at all then that me explain. These people that get used by someone will fall for every lie and every fake affection, because they want to believe those lies. They want to believe the lie that they are worth something that every word you say is true. That they mean something to you or that you actually care, But though they want to believe it they can taste the insincerity. They can always have that gut feeling that somethings wrong with the picture in front of them.
Then, when the truth gets out, and the lies unfold though your not hurt and your still trying to get that one girl or guy your fighting for. You tend to miss how broken hearted your human puppet is... The feel of the fact they weren't good enough for you. That every kiss and every hug all you thought about was what that significant person and what they were thinking at the moment. You never see just how hurt the person is that they never mattered

Just another poem

I pray to god with painful tears
why is life so hard why is it so unclear
One mistake, One wrong choice
I try so hard, but have no voice
Things have changed, so many I've lost
I never knew how much things could cost...

GUYS!!!

Guys are so weird! Guys always say that girls are so confusing and why can't girls be more simple. Well newsflash to all you guys, if any of you read this you guys are so complicated as well. I never understand how they think at all. Guy's no offense, but sometimes you are so stupid. So here's a guide for you...


The simple things about girls:
1. We want to talk to you not about your ex-girlfriends or who you got to flirt with you that day
2. We want to be with you but not when you act like your friends
3. We hate it when you only talk to us when it effects you
4. If we are upset then listen to us
5. If we are having a hard time be nice PLEASE
6. We like guys who are sweet and care about more things then video games and how hot every girl you see it.
7. Instead of making fun of us for our little silly things support us.

Now if any guys read this maybe you can put some things down...

Questions girls have about guys:
1. Why are you obsessed with killing video games
2. Why don't most of you guys care
3. Why are you so insensitive sometimes
4. Why do you mainly care about looks...

fill free to comment

I'm Sorry...

I'm sorry for all the hurtful words I said

I'm sorry that I left every time you came along

I'm sorry I was never good enough for you

I'm sorry...

But even though I don't like you anymore it still hurts

That every time I see you I can't handle it

I'm sorry but I can't be around you anymore

At least for now...

Questions...

    Life...How can things be so great one day and just horrible the next. Yeah, I know it's life, but seriously it's so hard to really rap your brain around this. I know that teens like myself have so many mixed hormones but seriously come on! Why do we care about so many things! What are clothes look like, who's hot, who's not, how do we look, what does he think, I can't believe she said that, Who said that behind my back, we don't all have the brain power capacity to handle this. When we can't handle this we break down, and when we break down it causes a lot more drama to add on. BUT there are also those days where everything goes right, where your friends make you smile, and when you feel like you could handle anything. I ask questions like this all the time...and I get the same answer...it's life. But then answer me this, why can no one ever give a clear description on what life is in a deep meaning....you tell me...

Life...

I once thought that life was all just cheer and love
But As I gaze at the stars above
Memories flash back to my eyes
I remember the truth; I remember the lies
And though life is not all filled with sin
The line between good and bad grows so thin
Peoples actions they make and words they say
Tend to become twisted and seen another way
It's hard to find someone to trust; someone who is true
When everyone swims in there lies, oceans blue
But though there is sorrow,there is a glint of hope
And though we are hanging on life's ripping rope
We have to be kind, not wear the evil crown
We should be picking each other up not be pushing them down
But all I am is one small voice
To change this world around, we must all make the choice

Forgive and Forget...

   It's hard to think that at my age you can have so many choices and actions that seem innocently right, but when you grow a little older you see how those choices wasn't as smart at the time. In your middle to late teen years this can possibly truly be the case. You can fall head over heels for a guy ( or a girl if you are a guy reading this) and to your excitement they fell for you too. This can get you so caught up how you caught this guys eyes that you think that this is so perfect.  Later though, to your own surprise all the hopes and dreams about the future ends just as fast as it started.
   For an example, I was in  a relationship with this guy and to me it was going great. I was caught up in the gleam in his eye or the light in his smile, that I didn't realize my own reality. So many times this guy was the highlight of my day. He was funny, smart, sweet, and just about everything I thought I could ever hope for in a guy. Everyday he showed more and more reasons for me to like him. I'm not the easiest girl to cope with either and somehow he handled it without getting super frustrated. I tend to over think things and will get into fights, but he stayed by me. He took my breath away to many times to recall. I fell and I fell hard.
    Well, one day he decided that he wanted to go back to being friends. (The over used expression as I dont like you anymore (; ) Not to difficult right? It's not a crime. I was so far into falling for him I took it really hard. 1st time  I cried so much.
    But, my point is, I thought back then I was going to be with him for a very long time. It was so innocent, so harmless, but I moved on and I can look back now and see my silly teenage mind seeing things in a blur passed the feelings. I wonder how I couldn't see through everything. But I am just a teenager what else could of happened.
    I can remember all the adults in my lifetime giving me advice about his, but of course I ignored them saying they just didn't understand. ( Sound familiar?) But they have been my age before, they have gone through the same things I go through. Teenagers don't listen, but that's because we are human!
   So here is the advice I give you, for all the not best choice you make in life, don't hate the experiences. Look back and acknowledge how you learned from it and how it shaped you. If there is any hate from it, let it go because you can't move on till you forgive and let go. The relationship I was in had a rough ending but I was mad. Once I let it go of all that anger, It was easy to see I was glad it happened and I moved on.
   It wasn't to easy, don't get me wrong, I miss those days a lot, but I learned from it and I'm ready to learn from my next dumb teenage choice.

Broken...

(A poem from a teenage mind)

Broken

I never thought I could feel that way about someone

That I could feel so safe in someone's arms

Or that I could wake up every morning missing his face so much

I never knew how painful someone could break my heart

How easy his love for me could disappear

 Or how I could cry so much

To Begin...

   To start off I must first say the reason for this blog to be is. I don't know if anyone out there will ever read the words that I write, but for a teenager like me, I have so much running through my head that I want to get out. I write alot, but always often like its not enough to have ideas, thoughts, storys, anything in ink in a note book that lays on the table next to my bed. You know, adults you may not realize but there is more going on in some teens head then just kissing and partying. We teens tend to care about other stuff alot more then you think. We have our opinions, yes most of the time they tend to be obserd, but we have our moments where we prove that we have more to show then just grades or an odd story about how our best friend jumped into a dumpster from a roof of a building. Well, If you read my blog you might just see what I mean...